The Tall & Short Of It: The "Short's" Response About Short Men's Woes

It's been a long time since I've posted something on The Single Girl's Club and let me just say that it's good to be back at the keyboard and it NOT be work related!

For those of you relatively new to the SGC and do not know me, I am the lone attached girl on this blog and have been attached for the past 2 1/2 years. Therefore, you can call me the "honorary" single girl, a title that I hold with a bit of pride. I'm also the oldest poster on this site at 31 (for now.) So let's just say I have quite a bit of -ahem- experience with the opposite sex (in all sorts of "situations": dating, friendships, "friendships" and otherwise - my longest relationship was 7 1/2 years.)

I received our first question posted to T's welcome to our column from a lovely lad who calls himself "so@24". Here's his question:

"why is it that short guys are automatically dismissed (at first glance) and have to work twice as hard to complete the the average/tall fuckers?"


Ok, first of all, let me tell you that I feel a little hypocritical when I first started answering this question. At 5'2", the shortest guy I've dated was 5'9" and the tallest was 6'4". I know. And yes, I HAVE been heard saying that I find it difficult to date a guy who is under 5'8". Here's my PERSONAL reason why: It's just a preference. When I first started dating in junior high, most of the guys I was attracted to were tall. That ended up not changing. But removed from my personal experience, here's my attempt at an explanation:

Society, unfortunately, seems to view tall men as having more power, more intelligence, being better providers, etc. etc. etc. I can go back historically and anthropologically about why this is so and go into great detail about size equaling strength, health, better hunting prowess and therefore "providing" prowess, yadda yadda yadda, and therefore it's social and biological manifestations in modern day times. I can also talk at a bit of length about some short men and their "Napoleon complexes" and how I feel some short men tend to "overcompensate" to their detriment. But then I could write a whole thesis about this topic, so I'll stop there.

Do I believe in all this, yes and no. Yes, I can sort of understand where the "mystique" of tall men comes from through attempts to explain it both historically and scientifically. But NO, I do not succumb to it. I mean, for one thing, we've gone way beyond our cavemen ancestors and many "biological" things about us are now a moot point. And sociological explanations? PAH! Educated opinions, but opinions nonetheless.

I know, I know, but I date tall men. It has nothing to do with discrimination and everything to do with preference. I mean, do people give beef to others who prefer redheads, or bald heads or people with a sixth toe? Not really (Ok, the sixth toe one's a bit of stretch.)

So here's the thing: Beyond all the explanations, you've got to take what you've got and sell it. I'm not saying become a napoleon - by all means, please don't. Try not to be one of those guys and just try to a nice guy. Don't overcompensate, don't try to work "harder" and think of it this way: All those girls who dismiss you right off the bat because of your height... most of them will probably not change their minds about you no matter HOW much they get to know you. It's like a brunette trying to get a guy who's solidly into blondes and only blondes to change his mind. It's more trouble than it's worth.

Instead, be a good guy. Be a good person. Be humble. Be considerate and a bit charming. And focus on the girls out there who DO like men under 5'6". Trust me, there many out there. (Including a lot of tall girls!) In fact, I know a few girls out there who like short guys (ummm... maybe if you're good I'll give you their numbers. LOL.) And you never know... maybe... just maybe... you're turning your attentions to the wrong girls and missing that cute one in the corner who's trying to avoid your gaze? ;)

Anyway, as a short Filipino girl, I get a bit of discrimination too - yes, yes, I can hear you saying that short asian girls get it "easier" - but trust me, I've gotten ignored by my fair share of guys who like 'em tall and like 'em white. LOL

At the very least, let me direct you to a few recent MSN and Slate articles which discuss this very issue, and interestingly too. If you can't take my word for it, maybe other opinions will help?
Tall Men and Money
Dating Tall Women
Dating When You're A Short Guy

Good luck and my blessings. The right one's out there.

I now pass the floor to T - I'm sure she has some astute things to say about the matter, AND she probably has similar issues due to the fact that she's a "tall girl amongst short-ass heifers." (her words, not mine.)