just, ew.

this entry will be short, but i just needed to post my uber-creepy experience at the bagel shop this morning. i was standing in line, minding my own business, day dreaming and fantasizing about the yummy jalepeno bagel i was about to purchase, when the guy in front of me decided to strike up a conversation. now, of course, since life sucks, destiny did not happen to place a super smart, sexy, dark-haired cutie with glasses in front of me, who would turn around, say something witty, then we'd run off, get married and have babies. no. instead it was an old man about 50 or 60, with white hair, something crusty stuck to his lip, ear hair, nose hair and wearing a members only jacket. the man of my dreams.

so i think i hear him say, "oh, i didn't know they made their own bagels here." i'm thinking, uh...who the fuck is he talking to? then, to my utter dismay, i realize it was directed to me. so i laugh uncomfortably and say, "uh, yeah i guess they do" (read: please shut the fuck up). apparently, he thought bagel places had bagels delivered to the store. uh, doesn't that defeat the whole point of a bagel shop? but whatever. he then goes on to talk about the weather, debating if it's gonna rain, and basically continues with annoying small talk. seriously, do i look like i care or want to talk to you even remotely? the answer would be NO.

he then let's me know that he's on the way to the race track. i automatically realize that i really just have met the man of my dreams and possibly a potential sugar daddy, since a man who spends his sunday afternoons gambling away his savings totally turns me on.

so he asks me if i've ever been to the track...uh, no. and then asks me if i'd like to go with him. uh, no and now i'm totally creeped out (even more so than before which was hard to believe).

i laugh, again, this time extremely uncomfortably, and quickly exit the bagel shop, sans yummy jalepeno bagel.

i can't help but think that there must be something wrong in the universe when only creepy old men try to pick up on me. cause really, the way it's supposed to go is that i really do meet the man of my dreams in a bagel shop, cause he too likes bagels and therefore he's amazing. **sigh** shit.