This little thread is in honor of an MSN article that we recently scoffed. Scoff along, won't you?
Bartenders’ best pickup advice
Few people have such a front-row seat to the dating and mating game as a bartender. Every night, these drink slingers watch would-be studs crash and burn, unlikely couples happily hook up, and more. Thanks to this experience, they’ve compiled a wealth of knowledge on the moves that work—not to mention those that bomb. Here, their best advice.
Try this easy opener
“I think the easiest way for a guy to start talking to a girl is to get next to her while she’s ordering her own drink and say, “That one’s on me.” Every girl will at least say thank you and if she’s interested, she’ll stick around and start a conversation.”
—Gia Favia, Rino, Chicago
Mo: That’s a pretty good one. I’d like to add that once she says “Thank you”, then you should wait until the girl introduces herself first. Because then you know that she has at least a miniscule bit of interest in you. Otherwise, if she says “Thanks” and then walks away, you know your answer. Note that the bartender who gave this piece of advice is a GIRL.
T: I agree that this is good. One of the only bits of advice that has true merit. I’d also like to note that the advice depends on where these bartenders are. Note that this girl if from Chicago. From my experiences, Chicago guys can be pretty straight-forward which girls appreciate.
Stand out with a signature drink
“For both guys and girls, the meeting and hooking-up game is all about making an impression. Sure… I think finding a signature drink helps you stand out from the pack of gin and tonics and vodka sodas. Not necessarily. Women who are sipping a bourbon definitely have a lot more mystique than one with a standard pink drink, True, I suppose… But is “mystique” really the right word? Drinks definitely say a lot about a person but, other than having a hearty tolerance or a dislike of sweet drinks, I don’t see how not ordering “the standard pink drink” really tells you a lot about a girl. just like a guy with a Manhattan seems more interesting than one with a beer. A Manhattan? That’s the gay man’s version of a martini. Napes on that. However, if he drinks a microbrew, a martini, a bourbon/scotch on the rocks, or some unfruity mixed drink that he made up himself, then that’s cool. I refer back to my 2005 study “What does a drink say about a man?” Find the drink that suits your style and personality and have a fun, cute story to go with it. Like ‘I drink Manhattans because my grandfather did.’ Um, I don’t care if your pappy drank it. You don’t. Unless you’re gay. Anything that helps you stand out from the pack and start a conversation is a plus.”
—Josh Wojcik, Chocolat Michel Cluizel, New York
”Anything that helps you stand out”? That’s scary. Next thing you know, there’ll be men all over the place wearing houndstooth Kangol hats and women with feather boas, etc. wtf. I’m sorry, but personally, if you’re doing or drinking or wearing something for the sole purpose of standing out, I can usually read that and it means you’re trying too hard. Oh, and note that the bartender giving this advice this time is a GUY.
A guy who seems to work someplace shi-shi, which means it’s full of fronters. Which means make up some bullshit story to justify the fact you like girly drinks. If you like girly drinks, fine. Just be a man and own that shit.
Stick to the three-minute rule
“From what I’ve seen, a woman’s usually made up her mind about a guy in the first three minutes—and I’ve never seen anyone’s mind change after that. So guys should go in for the pickup, but if three minutes go by and she’s not warming up, they should cut their losses and move on.”
—David Cerequas, Craftbar, New York
That’s one rule that I think is not hard and fast. Sometimes it can take a girl 5 minutes. LOL
Pretty solid advice…though I agree that 5 minutes is the topper. Also notice that Craftbar sounds less pompous than “Chocolat Michel Cluizel”.
Be sincere
“From what I’ve seen, it’s the Year of the Geeks and Good Guys: It’s not about being suave or sexy, but about being genuine and attentive. Women are tired of being hit on by jerks whose heads swivel every time another pretty girl walks by. Give a woman your undivided attention, and you’ll stand out from the crowd.”
—Terril Johnson, Shortstop, Los Angeles
Yeah, but don’t stare at her too hard or too long. Then it’s just stalker.
Best. Advice. Here. And look…he/she works at the Shortstop…(one of the most unpretentious bars you'll ever step in)
Look out for the Lemon Drop
“You can definitely spot the girls who are looking for a good time and want to flirt: They usually come in groups and line up at the bar versus at a table to make it easier for guys to talk to them. And if you see them drinking Lemon Drops — a yellowish liquid in a shot glass garnished with a lemon that’s been dipped in sugar — it’s a sure sign that these girls just wanna have fun! It’s replaced the Cosmo as the drink of choice for the Sex and the City-type girls.”
I’m one of those girls who never joined the Sex and the City bandwagon. Maybe it’s because … hmmm… I dunno… a strong, independent woman who knows what she wants and if that means she wants lots of unattached sex… that’s not new, at least to moi. Yes, the Cosmo is played out, but if it’s the Lemon Drop that’s the new “hey, look at me guys, I wanna have fun!” then perhaps you should stick to the Cosmo because it’s UNCOOL and so you won’t be part of this heifer bandwagon. Just saying. Geez, just drink what you like. Unless you’re a guy and drink Cosmos. LOL
—Erica Jobe, Moda, New York I’m disappointed in you, Erica. Uncool? Yes. But it sounds like she works at the type of bar “those girls” frequent. And by “those girls” I mean drunken whores.
Try talking about your troubles
“There was one guy who got a call on his cell phone about his dog being injured by a car—it felt like every woman in the bar was trying to help him and comfort him. Now, I’m not recommending guys lie and say their pet was hurt, but the lesson here is don’t be afraid to tell a girl about a dilemma or problem you’re struggling with. Women like to help.”
—Chris Lower, Gator’s, Minnesota
Oh lord, once again I’m seeing fleeting images of men at bars around the country looking all wounded puppy (no pun intended) just so some girl can go “what’s wrong?” And he’ll say some lame-ass story just to get in your pants. NYET!!!! This ONLY happens if the girl is already into you. And even if your “predicament” is for real, most girls who are chipping in wanting to help you out are… just chipping in wanting to help you out. It often doesn’t mean that she’s creaming her jeans for you. Sorry to be rude.
Also, I don’t want somebody crying in their beer because their cat has cancer. That f’ed up and sad but I don’t want to hear about it. You’re totally harshing my gig. Stop bringing me down, man.
Be a big spender
“Splurge on a nice glass of champagne (think Cristal) Only if you’re P. Diddy or some shit like that. and send it over to the woman you’re interested in. This works better than anything I’ve ever seen. It shows a guy’s not cheap and that he’s interested enough in the girl to spend some money on her. It’s smooth, impressive—and works almost every time!” It works every time to women who are GOLD DIGGERS. If you buy me some freaking bottle of champagne – well one, I don’t like champagne – but then I’d think, “Damn, what a flosser. But whatever. HEY GIRLS, WANT SOME FREE BUBBLY????”
—Joseph Barbour, Body English at the Hard Rock, Las Vegas Notice this tool works in Vegas…
Linds: Mo, I think your amendments to the article are spot on. And since when is “be sincere” considered advice? How is that not obvious? It’s not like it’s some new fad for girls to not be into douche bags. Or maybe i’m just really far out of the loop. And, really, if you need to make a conscious effort to be sincere, then you probably shouldn’t even bother opening your mouth.And who the hell is this Erica bitch? I say boo to your lemon drop theory, girl-that-must-only-commune-with-other-slutty-bitches.
I’m going to join Linds in signing the “Just Say No to Douche Bags” bill. It’s been an unspoken rule for too long and should be made a law.
Also, I agree that if you can’t seem to say non-douchey things, then you probably are an assclown and should just not talk.
And I boo Erica for making it so that I can probably never take a lemon drop shot again. They’re tasty and now they have a stigma. Thanks, Whore McWhores-a-lot [those girls in the bar, not necessarily Erica].
Pretty Guy of the Week
Between him and his wife (lucky!), their kids have hit the genetic jackpot.
Shout-out to DwayneJohnsonFever.Net for the pictures. More deliciousness can be found here...
I loves me some Scotsmen
Is it just ME, or are Scottish men amongst the GREATEST and AWESOMENESS specimens of male-dom on the planet?
I just came to that realization as I sat home sick the other day, bored out of my mind. I mean, besides Gerry "This is Sparta" Butler, whom any bitch that knows me, knows rules as king on my "sexy laddie" top 15, (knocking off - gasp - my long-time #1 Jason Statham) there's just a crazy number of amazing famous scotsmen out there to admire. (And thanks, Nikkia, for giving me the constant daydream in my head of rushing Gerry on campus and screaming "Gerry, it's me! Prepare for glory!")
But really, I mean, besides the fact that some of these famous highlanders are so easy on the eyes, almost all of them exude this... magnetic... addictive... charm. Is it the brisk, blustery weather? The oats? The kilts? The hundreds of years of oppression from the Brits concentrating into a whimsy outlook on life? I mean, a culture that can come up with haggis as a form of psuedo-edible and keep a straight face about it is worth a closer look, if you ask me. Ah well, whatever it is, it doesn't matter. For lo, I am well-pleased. I curtsy in your direction, my lords.
Gorgeous Scottish visions to behold:
Kevin McKidd (currently on the HBO Miniseries "Rome". GRRRRRRRR.)
Paul McGillion (Best known for his tenure in Stargate: Atlantis. Ok, given, he's technically a Canadian actor, but he was born in Scotland, so that counts, right? And look - he's representing for his birthplace with that jacket. Sometimes he can look... not so much, but in this pic, he's looking quite nice.)
James McAvoy (Don't recognize him? He was in Last King of Scotland... and The Chronic- WHAT!, etc. as Mr. Tumnus, The Faun. Rather adorable, if you ask me.)
Dougray Scott (Quite a lovely gentleman as well, don't you think? Currently doing the rounds in Desperate Housewives but best known for his roles in Mission Impossible II, Deep Impact, Another 9 1/2 Weeks, and as *sigh* Prince Henry in Ever After...)
Ewan MacGregor (Ah, Ewan, Ewan, Ewan, my darling... how far you've come since my first enlightened moments beholding your magnetic eyes as you dove into a filthy pub toilet to recover your suppository in Trainspotting.... It was enchantment ever since.)
And of course... Hee Hee Hee (MUST there be an introduction?????)
But you know, besides visions of Scottish tastiness dancing in my head, I must also represent for the amazingness - sheer AMAZINGNESS - of the Scotsmen below. Wickedly talented, horrendously humorous, and oozing oodles and oodles of charm to boot, they are the torch in the darkness, the nectar to my ambrosia, the joy amongst the bitterness, the wind beneath my wing. They are DEMIGODS in their own right, for they just *ROCK*. And THAT to me, makes them just as sexy.
Billy Connolly. (Two words: Kicks Ass. Does ANYONE remember when he had that short stint as their replacement instructor in the 80's sitcom Head of the Class? Howard Hesseman couldn't hold a candle. In fact, not very many people these days can.)
John Hannah (Truly brilliant. Truly impressive. Truly a fan, Mr. Hannah. I am sold on you. I first saw you on the big screen in Four Weddings and a Funeral and the poem scene caused two things to happen: one, I wept copious tears and two, you were immediately adored.)
Robert Carlyle (One of THE most talented sons of bitches I've ever laid eyes on. Wordless, complete respect. When I hear he's in a movie, I get *that* much more excited.)
And last but certainly not least -
Alan Cumming (This boy is too much for me to stand. He's just SCREAMING to be worshipped by me. I mean, let's go over the checklist, shall we? Talented, check. Hilarious, check. Witty beyond reason, check. Has sexy accent, check. Doesn't give a shit, check. Stylish, check.Gay Bisexual and loving it, check.... Sorry, Lindsay, I think I may have to beat you up for him.)
Coming soon: The Top 15 extravaganza
I just came to that realization as I sat home sick the other day, bored out of my mind. I mean, besides Gerry "This is Sparta" Butler, whom any bitch that knows me, knows rules as king on my "sexy laddie" top 15, (knocking off - gasp - my long-time #1 Jason Statham) there's just a crazy number of amazing famous scotsmen out there to admire. (And thanks, Nikkia, for giving me the constant daydream in my head of rushing Gerry on campus and screaming "Gerry, it's me! Prepare for glory!")
But really, I mean, besides the fact that some of these famous highlanders are so easy on the eyes, almost all of them exude this... magnetic... addictive... charm. Is it the brisk, blustery weather? The oats? The kilts? The hundreds of years of oppression from the Brits concentrating into a whimsy outlook on life? I mean, a culture that can come up with haggis as a form of psuedo-edible and keep a straight face about it is worth a closer look, if you ask me. Ah well, whatever it is, it doesn't matter. For lo, I am well-pleased. I curtsy in your direction, my lords.
Gorgeous Scottish visions to behold:
Kevin McKidd (currently on the HBO Miniseries "Rome". GRRRRRRRR.)
Paul McGillion (Best known for his tenure in Stargate: Atlantis. Ok, given, he's technically a Canadian actor, but he was born in Scotland, so that counts, right? And look - he's representing for his birthplace with that jacket. Sometimes he can look... not so much, but in this pic, he's looking quite nice.)
James McAvoy (Don't recognize him? He was in Last King of Scotland... and The Chronic- WHAT!, etc. as Mr. Tumnus, The Faun. Rather adorable, if you ask me.)
Dougray Scott (Quite a lovely gentleman as well, don't you think? Currently doing the rounds in Desperate Housewives but best known for his roles in Mission Impossible II, Deep Impact, Another 9 1/2 Weeks, and as *sigh* Prince Henry in Ever After...)
Ewan MacGregor (Ah, Ewan, Ewan, Ewan, my darling... how far you've come since my first enlightened moments beholding your magnetic eyes as you dove into a filthy pub toilet to recover your suppository in Trainspotting.... It was enchantment ever since.)
And of course... Hee Hee Hee (MUST there be an introduction?????)
But you know, besides visions of Scottish tastiness dancing in my head, I must also represent for the amazingness - sheer AMAZINGNESS - of the Scotsmen below. Wickedly talented, horrendously humorous, and oozing oodles and oodles of charm to boot, they are the torch in the darkness, the nectar to my ambrosia, the joy amongst the bitterness, the wind beneath my wing. They are DEMIGODS in their own right, for they just *ROCK*. And THAT to me, makes them just as sexy.
Billy Connolly. (Two words: Kicks Ass. Does ANYONE remember when he had that short stint as their replacement instructor in the 80's sitcom Head of the Class? Howard Hesseman couldn't hold a candle. In fact, not very many people these days can.)
John Hannah (Truly brilliant. Truly impressive. Truly a fan, Mr. Hannah. I am sold on you. I first saw you on the big screen in Four Weddings and a Funeral and the poem scene caused two things to happen: one, I wept copious tears and two, you were immediately adored.)
Robert Carlyle (One of THE most talented sons of bitches I've ever laid eyes on. Wordless, complete respect. When I hear he's in a movie, I get *that* much more excited.)
And last but certainly not least -
Alan Cumming (This boy is too much for me to stand. He's just SCREAMING to be worshipped by me. I mean, let's go over the checklist, shall we? Talented, check. Hilarious, check. Witty beyond reason, check. Has sexy accent, check. Doesn't give a shit, check. Stylish, check.
Coming soon: The Top 15 extravaganza
Men and Pants. . . Ooooh Jeans!!
I did not realize when I chimed in about doing this post how much work it would be. I mean hours and hours of perusing websites filled with pics of some really HOT men. BAAABBBYYY Damn! Because I am the other "man in woman's skin" of our group, I wanted to do a Men and Pants theme for our Dos and Don'ts posts.Being that men don't have a wide variety of apparel, tops or bottoms, I don't know how many parts there will be. With that said, let's get to my absolute favorite thing for a man to wear. JEANS!!
How a man wears his jeans tells me a little something about his mood at the time and his personality. Does he want to be understated or really stand out? Serious, yet laid back? Or laid back, yet serious? There is a difference, trust me. Fun and playful? Or dark and mysterious? I could probably do this all night.
Take this pic of Went. How he's wearing his jeans tells me. . . I've got an extremely dirty mind. Stop that Nik! *slaps hand* Seriously though, this is a good example of one of the best male ensembles ever. No matter the man's shape, a pair of jeans, an untucked button-down and a jacket can do no wrong. As long as it matches and you don't have some weird pattern fetish. Eew.
Just to prove that it is not all about Went. I give you Gary.
Okay moving on. Maybe its my generation but I always love to see a guy in a medium to dark color pair of jeans wearing gleaming white sneaks. Not tennis shoes, sneaks. Again, if a guy takes the time to actually make sure his kicks are clean and jeans are purposefully rumpled, not something he just pulled out of the hamper, then it looks effortless and oh so cute!!
I'm going to have to buy him a short set.
Sometimes just jeans will do. I have no words. Mesmerized by the pretty.
Last but not least, here are some examples of effortless jean hotness.
Tell me you don't think that's hot.
Wouldn't you like to roll around in some hay with this one? T? Maybe put you up against the barn door? Um, it's your fantasy go for it. Ha ha ha!
We could sit up all night drinking coffee and discussing existentialism. Yeah right. ;)To be continued. . . I think.
Why Women Need to See 300
So I went to go see 300 earlier this week after days and days of eager anticipation. Given, I'm a BOY in a woman's skin, so my reasons for wanting to see it may differ slightly from the average girl. But in any case, I highly suggest that women see this movie for a plethora of reasons, but I'll list the top 5.
Reason #5: To it's bare essence, it's a romantic story
The story is based on an ancient historic account of the battle of Thermopylae (a narrow mountain pass by the Mediterranean sea) around 480 BCE that involved about 100,000 invading Persian troops attempting to conquer the city-state of Sparta (as well as Greece in its entirety.) 300 Spartan warriors (along with about 4000 Greek allies AND Athenian naval ships poised for battle on the water) were present at the battle. The Spartans and their allies held their ground for 2 days, impressively killing vast numbers of Persians in comparison to their own light casualties. In the end, the majority of Greek warriors, including all but 2 Spartans (the 2 were sent as messengers) were killed.
Over the years, the story has changed a bit to include omitting the Athenian navy completely and lessening the numbers of Greek allies fighting alongside the Spartans. At it's barest and most romantic, the battle became a story about how 300 lone Spartans held their ground to defend everything they held dear (their land, their families, the idea of freedom and democracy) against 1 million Persians.
The movie leans towards the latter, more romantic tale. The 1 million Persians are there. The 3oo Spartans are there. But there are a few other changes including some Spartan allies, cutting the two historical Spartan warrior-messengers to one, and characters beyond mythological proportions. Keep in mind that THIS movie was based on Frank Miller and Lynn Varley's graphic novel of the same name, and so the writers and production team strived to keep it very true to the book.
With that in mind, the story is very romantic. The concepts of bravery, self-sacrifice, valour, patriotism, and yes - LOVE - are all present. (I admit that I am ACUTELY aware of this movie's release in the midst of current American/Middle Eastern conflicts and what that means, but that's a whole different post in a whole different blog.)
Despite what critics have said (there's been mixed reviews), I absolutely loved it and believed that the critics who pooh-poohed the whole thing just didn't get it. The movie is not meant to be as emotionally deep or as character-driven as they thought it should be. It's based on a GRAPHIC NOVEL, for chrissakes, and what that means to me is that the overarching CONCEPT, connection to the GRANDER SOCIAL SITUATION, and the ARTISTRY come first. Besides, I thought the characters (especially Leonidas and his queen Gorgo) were as developed as they could be, impressively within a movie that focused on battle scenes. I got what they wanted. I got what they were willing to do, what they were willing to give up. And boy howdy, if that ain't romantic, then I don't know.
Reason #4: The battle scenes
... are awesome!!!! Ok, so maybe you're not one of those girls who's into that sort of thing, but trust me. A lot of the movie's scenes were shot in slo-mo to heighten the audience's awareness of the artistry and the emotional impact. That includes the battle scenes. There's something... poetic about them. And no, they're not as disgusting or gory as you would think it to be.
Not to mention that the Spartans KICKED ASS! (Channeling my inner guy here.) But whoever choreographed these scenes ... you're beautiful, man. I'm not saying that 300 should be in the same level as Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon; Hero; The Matrix; hell, most martial arts/action flicks, but still - it's up there in stylization.
Reason #3: I am Gorgo, hear me roar
In a time and place where women were considered inferior and subjected to the whims of their fathers and husbands, Spartan women were given a surprising amount of power and free will. They were allowed to own and control property, were taught to read and write, and were expected to be as strong and athletic as their male counterparts. Spartan women were also warriors.
Queen Gorgo was not given as much screen time as King Leonidas (and understandably so, since, yes, it is a battle movie), but her strength of character and Spartan upbringing was made apparent very quickly and continued throughout the movie. In one scene, the Persian messenger says: Who allows this woman to speak before us men? To which, Gorgo replied: Because only Spartan women give birth to real Spartan men.
There are also moments in the movie where you are given hints of how important Gorgo's opinions were to King Leonidas.
Anyway, I'm not going to give away any more, but in the end, you may love her or hate her, but either way you will RESPECT her.
Go sistah.
Reason #2: The art direction and cinematography
In their attempt to recreate the mood and artistry of the graphic novel, the production team used slow-motion photography, oversaturated detail, heightening of some aspects, softening of others, dramatic lighting, and an overall sepia-toned color theme. Just like another Frank Miller graphic novel turned-to-movie (uh... c'mon, you know which one), the movie, I thought, succeeded in capturing the book's feel. Totally loved it. Gorgeous. If anything, see this movie for the sheer beauty and visual spectacle.
Reason #1: Shirtless men
Ok, so I still haven't convinced you to go see 300? Imagine dozens of men at the peak of their physical prowess roaming the screen shiny and sweaty wearing nothing but leather loincloths and red cloaks. Eye candy. Beyond 6 packs - 8 packs! Hotness.
JUST GO.
Reason #5: To it's bare essence, it's a romantic story
The story is based on an ancient historic account of the battle of Thermopylae (a narrow mountain pass by the Mediterranean sea) around 480 BCE that involved about 100,000 invading Persian troops attempting to conquer the city-state of Sparta (as well as Greece in its entirety.) 300 Spartan warriors (along with about 4000 Greek allies AND Athenian naval ships poised for battle on the water) were present at the battle. The Spartans and their allies held their ground for 2 days, impressively killing vast numbers of Persians in comparison to their own light casualties. In the end, the majority of Greek warriors, including all but 2 Spartans (the 2 were sent as messengers) were killed.
Over the years, the story has changed a bit to include omitting the Athenian navy completely and lessening the numbers of Greek allies fighting alongside the Spartans. At it's barest and most romantic, the battle became a story about how 300 lone Spartans held their ground to defend everything they held dear (their land, their families, the idea of freedom and democracy) against 1 million Persians.
The movie leans towards the latter, more romantic tale. The 1 million Persians are there. The 3oo Spartans are there. But there are a few other changes including some Spartan allies, cutting the two historical Spartan warrior-messengers to one, and characters beyond mythological proportions. Keep in mind that THIS movie was based on Frank Miller and Lynn Varley's graphic novel of the same name, and so the writers and production team strived to keep it very true to the book.
With that in mind, the story is very romantic. The concepts of bravery, self-sacrifice, valour, patriotism, and yes - LOVE - are all present. (I admit that I am ACUTELY aware of this movie's release in the midst of current American/Middle Eastern conflicts and what that means, but that's a whole different post in a whole different blog.)
Despite what critics have said (there's been mixed reviews), I absolutely loved it and believed that the critics who pooh-poohed the whole thing just didn't get it. The movie is not meant to be as emotionally deep or as character-driven as they thought it should be. It's based on a GRAPHIC NOVEL, for chrissakes, and what that means to me is that the overarching CONCEPT, connection to the GRANDER SOCIAL SITUATION, and the ARTISTRY come first. Besides, I thought the characters (especially Leonidas and his queen Gorgo) were as developed as they could be, impressively within a movie that focused on battle scenes. I got what they wanted. I got what they were willing to do, what they were willing to give up. And boy howdy, if that ain't romantic, then I don't know.
Reason #4: The battle scenes
... are awesome!!!! Ok, so maybe you're not one of those girls who's into that sort of thing, but trust me. A lot of the movie's scenes were shot in slo-mo to heighten the audience's awareness of the artistry and the emotional impact. That includes the battle scenes. There's something... poetic about them. And no, they're not as disgusting or gory as you would think it to be.
Not to mention that the Spartans KICKED ASS! (Channeling my inner guy here.) But whoever choreographed these scenes ... you're beautiful, man. I'm not saying that 300 should be in the same level as Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon; Hero; The Matrix; hell, most martial arts/action flicks, but still - it's up there in stylization.
Reason #3: I am Gorgo, hear me roar
In a time and place where women were considered inferior and subjected to the whims of their fathers and husbands, Spartan women were given a surprising amount of power and free will. They were allowed to own and control property, were taught to read and write, and were expected to be as strong and athletic as their male counterparts. Spartan women were also warriors.
Queen Gorgo was not given as much screen time as King Leonidas (and understandably so, since, yes, it is a battle movie), but her strength of character and Spartan upbringing was made apparent very quickly and continued throughout the movie. In one scene, the Persian messenger says: Who allows this woman to speak before us men? To which, Gorgo replied: Because only Spartan women give birth to real Spartan men.
There are also moments in the movie where you are given hints of how important Gorgo's opinions were to King Leonidas.
Anyway, I'm not going to give away any more, but in the end, you may love her or hate her, but either way you will RESPECT her.
Go sistah.
Reason #2: The art direction and cinematography
In their attempt to recreate the mood and artistry of the graphic novel, the production team used slow-motion photography, oversaturated detail, heightening of some aspects, softening of others, dramatic lighting, and an overall sepia-toned color theme. Just like another Frank Miller graphic novel turned-to-movie (uh... c'mon, you know which one), the movie, I thought, succeeded in capturing the book's feel. Totally loved it. Gorgeous. If anything, see this movie for the sheer beauty and visual spectacle.
Reason #1: Shirtless men
Ok, so I still haven't convinced you to go see 300? Imagine dozens of men at the peak of their physical prowess roaming the screen shiny and sweaty wearing nothing but leather loincloths and red cloaks. Eye candy. Beyond 6 packs - 8 packs! Hotness.
JUST GO.
Pretty Guys of the Week
Ok, so I'm a little late with this week's poster-boy so to make up for it I give you not 1, but 2 tasty bits to brighten up your browser window:
Guy #1: Johnny Messner
Guy #1: Johnny Messner
Big ups to http://www.johnnymessner.net/ for the pics.
Links to more pictures:
http://www.johnnymessner.net/sc/id24.htm http://www.kclyn.com/jmo/id65.htm
http://www.kclyn.com/jmo/id57.htm http://www.kclyn.com/jmo/id17.htm
http://www.kclyn.com/jmo/id62.htm http://www.kclyn.com/jmo/id39.htm
http://www.kclyn.com/jmo/id64.htm
seriously though?
I wonder about men sometimes. Not like "I wonder what he does for a living," or if my shaggy-haired neighbor watches too much porn (he does)...but really wonder about them. Like if they've got a screw or two loose. Or if they even had any screws to begin with. Ones that leave you thinking "is this guy for REAL?" You've had encounters like these if you've walked away from the interaction...
a) completely and utterly speechless
b) wondering if the entire species is tainted, or just this one
c) with any reaction similar to "bwa...???"
The most recent occurance of this type took place in the elevator of my apartment buildling. [arms full of groceries, just back from the gym. elevator stops on the 2nd floor, young man with grossly-oversized fake diamond studs in both ears and a tshirt that could easily fit three of me, or one morbidly obese person, steps in]
Homeboy: hey, how's it goin
me: um, all right. been a long day
Homeboy: hey man, I hear you. first day on the job
me: oh? [raises eyebrow]
Homeboy: GIRLS GONE WILD!!!!!!!!!
me: [blank stare] ...
Homeboy: i'm selling them! want a copy?
me: [continued blank stare] um...no
Homeboy: cool, cool. well take 'er easy [exits elevator]
me: ...
a) completely and utterly speechless
b) wondering if the entire species is tainted, or just this one
c) with any reaction similar to "bwa...???"
The most recent occurance of this type took place in the elevator of my apartment buildling. [arms full of groceries, just back from the gym. elevator stops on the 2nd floor, young man with grossly-oversized fake diamond studs in both ears and a tshirt that could easily fit three of me, or one morbidly obese person, steps in]
Homeboy: hey, how's it goin
me: um, all right. been a long day
Homeboy: hey man, I hear you. first day on the job
me: oh? [raises eyebrow]
Homeboy: GIRLS GONE WILD!!!!!!!!!
me: [blank stare] ...
Homeboy: i'm selling them! want a copy?
me: [continued blank stare] um...no
Homeboy: cool, cool. well take 'er easy [exits elevator]
me: ...
Guys with Girlfriends Love Me
No. Not like that.
See, I’m a cool chick. And being as cool a chick as I am, one that assumes guys aren’t hitting on me and expecting nothing from them in that respect a majority of the time, I think guys realize that and therefore have no problem talking to me. I am not “a threat”. However, it seems like almost all the guys who end up talking to me have girlfriends. And while that’s fine (I don’t have as many guy friends as I used to), it can be frustrating when they’re good-looking and we get along extremely well.
But there isn’t much I can do about it. I mean, what can I do? Stop being as awesome as I am? I think not.
The “Guys Happily in Relationships” category is by far the most frustrating of the clusters of men that immediately like me. These categories are not mutually exclusive and are in no particular order:
Guys Happily in Relationships
Married? Deeply in love with your girlfriend? Never going to be single again? Then you love me. You find my awesomeness attractive and dig the fact that your girlfriend doesn’t have to worry about me trying to stick my hand down your pants or something equally scandalous.
Gay Men
I love the gays and the gays love me. I’m about 6’0, have a big rack and rock an afro every now and again. ‘Nuff said.
Guys from the East Coast
Guys from Boston especially. This also includes guys from Chicago. Yes, I know Illinois isn’t the East Coast but until I meet more guys from the Midwest, they don’t get their own category. And I only know a handful of guys from the South so no category for them yet either.
Irish Guys
I’m talking guys actually from Ireland, though the Irish-American contingent has made a strong showing as well. My great-grandmother is Irish so I figure it’s genetics.
Manwhores
I can’t exactly explain this one. Perhaps it’s because I’m a bit of a flirt? Or because I’m a little touchy-feely (hugs make the world go round!)? I do find manwhores amusing regardless so no harm, no foul.
Manwhores are a bit frustrating as well because, as cute and charming as they are, I’m a little weary of where they may have been. And by "a little" I mean a lot.
I'm also noticing another category "Men from Eastern Block Countries" - Russia, The Ukraine, etc. - is quickly picking up speed. The reason for this is also a mystery.
All I hope is that I don't continue a disconcerting pattern in my recent life and discover that all the men I end up having a crush on fit into the "I Figure Out I Like You, Then I Find Out You Just Got A Girlfriend Or Disappear Altogether" category.
Men and Shirts, The Final Chapter
I hope all of you have enjoyed our wonderful foray into the world of effortless male shirt dressing. I'll be moving on to our honorable mentions, but before I do, let me remind you of our 3rd most flattering top for men, the rib turtleneck, and leave you with examples of BAD turtleneck choices:
Bad Turtleneck #1:
Bobby, Bobby, Bobby. Why, pray tell, did you think it was acceptable for the dresser on this photo shoot to stick you with not only a PLUM PURPLE turtleneck, but a thin, almost threadbare one at that?
Bad turtleneck #2:
Is this part of a required company softball team uniform? I dunno... I'm just... I'm sorry.
Bad turtleneck #3:
Dad? A short-sleeved MOCK turtleneck? Dad, NO!
Bad turtleneck #4:
"Oh Lars, I love you, I do... but we cannot be together. It was never meant to be. Your khaki high-waisted pants... your blue puffy mock turtleneck... with dog paw branding on the collar... it compels me... to run... run away... so far away."
And now, to close out the series, I give you my picks for Flattering Shirt Options: Honorable Mentions. These shirts are good ones in their own right, with a number of reasons why they can be flattering, however, there are also reasons why these shirts did not make it onto the top 3.
Honorable Mention Shirt #1: The short-sleeve button down:
As a cousin to the #1 flattering shirt, the long-sleeve button down, this top has so many things going well for it: It's figure-forgiving, a great casual option, and so easy to wear and coordinate with. HOWEVER, I feel that this shirt gives men an excuse to not try and that's why this shirt is relegated to the honorable mention category.
To specify, I think the majority of men out there exploit this option to the extreme, meaning that they have entire RACKS of short-sleeved shirts without a break in the monotony. Because they're so easy - they can be worn in any situation with the exception of business or formal, it gives men an excuse to not mix things up a bit in their repetoire. Although quite honestly in my opinion, a short-sleeved button down shirt should only be worn on the most casual of occasions.
Then there's the kissing cousin, the guayabera. The guayabera is latin american/carribbean style short-sleeved button down shirt, more specifically adopted by Cuba as the iconic male dress staple of the country. (In the Philippines, we have the barong tagalog which is actually wedding or special event attire.)
Guayabera-style shirts all over the place, either reflecting the traditional pattern of 2-4 pockets and alforzas (pleats) in the front, to "modern" interpretations involving things like flames or 8-balls or bowling pins replacing the alforzas. The modern styles range from pretty acceptable (good to wear during the summer and to bbqs) to downright tacky, if you ask me.
Some examples of good short-sleeved, button down shirts:
Thank you, Channing.
Thank you, headless man.
And thank you, good guayabera-wearing headless man.
Some BAD short-sleeved button downs:
A Hawaiian shirt worn ON THE JOB... I'm hoping this pic is out of context and that it was Tiki Day or something at the H&R Block.
Horizontal stripe patterned button-down shirt AND shell necklace. Just...
ok, moving on.
Honorable Mention Shirt #2: The tank top, aka wife beater
And you know, I even hesitate a bit to add this as an honorable mention. The tank top offers a guy a very delicate balance. It can look really hot on the right man in the right situation, but boy... can go so very wrong so very quickly.
Here are my rules for wearing tanks:
1) Tanks must be fitted
2) Tanks must be clean (it's sad that I even have to post this as a rule)
3) Tanks should really only be worn as an undershirt, but ...
4) They can be worn as an outershirt only under the following circumstances: when it's really hot; when you're at the beach; when you're working out; if you're working on a car or motorcycle in a stuffy hot garage.
Muscle tees are in the tank top category, and hence, must adhere to the above rules as well.
Some really good examples of tank tops worn right:
Special thanks to Nikkia for convincing her boyfriend to pose for this shoot.
Oh Ryan, that muscle shirt is doing WONDERS. Keep up with the overhead presses, darling.
Excuse me, Johnny, but before we begin, can you put out your ciga...
oooh, tattoos...
And now for the bad:
Mesh! What? NO!!!!!
Grandpa!? Beer! NO!!!!
Oh god help me, nooooooooooooooNOOOOOOOO!!!
Time for a palate-cleanser, QUICK! I don't wanna sign off on this blog like this!
...
.....
(Sigh...) Thank you, Raoul. Formally Signing off.
Speaking of which, what a good way to segue into Chapter Two of the Proper Male Dressing series. I think that Nikkia had some opinions about trousers?
Bad Turtleneck #1:
Bobby, Bobby, Bobby. Why, pray tell, did you think it was acceptable for the dresser on this photo shoot to stick you with not only a PLUM PURPLE turtleneck, but a thin, almost threadbare one at that?Bad turtleneck #2:
Is this part of a required company softball team uniform? I dunno... I'm just... I'm sorry.Bad turtleneck #3:
Dad? A short-sleeved MOCK turtleneck? Dad, NO!Bad turtleneck #4:
"Oh Lars, I love you, I do... but we cannot be together. It was never meant to be. Your khaki high-waisted pants... your blue puffy mock turtleneck... with dog paw branding on the collar... it compels me... to run... run away... so far away."And now, to close out the series, I give you my picks for Flattering Shirt Options: Honorable Mentions. These shirts are good ones in their own right, with a number of reasons why they can be flattering, however, there are also reasons why these shirts did not make it onto the top 3.
Honorable Mention Shirt #1: The short-sleeve button down:
As a cousin to the #1 flattering shirt, the long-sleeve button down, this top has so many things going well for it: It's figure-forgiving, a great casual option, and so easy to wear and coordinate with. HOWEVER, I feel that this shirt gives men an excuse to not try and that's why this shirt is relegated to the honorable mention category.
To specify, I think the majority of men out there exploit this option to the extreme, meaning that they have entire RACKS of short-sleeved shirts without a break in the monotony. Because they're so easy - they can be worn in any situation with the exception of business or formal, it gives men an excuse to not mix things up a bit in their repetoire. Although quite honestly in my opinion, a short-sleeved button down shirt should only be worn on the most casual of occasions.
Then there's the kissing cousin, the guayabera. The guayabera is latin american/carribbean style short-sleeved button down shirt, more specifically adopted by Cuba as the iconic male dress staple of the country. (In the Philippines, we have the barong tagalog which is actually wedding or special event attire.)
Guayabera-style shirts all over the place, either reflecting the traditional pattern of 2-4 pockets and alforzas (pleats) in the front, to "modern" interpretations involving things like flames or 8-balls or bowling pins replacing the alforzas. The modern styles range from pretty acceptable (good to wear during the summer and to bbqs) to downright tacky, if you ask me.
Some examples of good short-sleeved, button down shirts:
Thank you, Channing. And thank you, good guayabera-wearing headless man.Some BAD short-sleeved button downs:
A Hawaiian shirt worn ON THE JOB... I'm hoping this pic is out of context and that it was Tiki Day or something at the H&R Block. Horizontal stripe patterned button-down shirt AND shell necklace. Just...ok, moving on.
Honorable Mention Shirt #2: The tank top, aka wife beater
And you know, I even hesitate a bit to add this as an honorable mention. The tank top offers a guy a very delicate balance. It can look really hot on the right man in the right situation, but boy... can go so very wrong so very quickly.
Here are my rules for wearing tanks:
1) Tanks must be fitted
2) Tanks must be clean (it's sad that I even have to post this as a rule)
3) Tanks should really only be worn as an undershirt, but ...
4) They can be worn as an outershirt only under the following circumstances: when it's really hot; when you're at the beach; when you're working out; if you're working on a car or motorcycle in a stuffy hot garage.
Muscle tees are in the tank top category, and hence, must adhere to the above rules as well.
Some really good examples of tank tops worn right:
Special thanks to Nikkia for convincing her boyfriend to pose for this shoot. Oh Ryan, that muscle shirt is doing WONDERS. Keep up with the overhead presses, darling.Excuse me, Johnny, but before we begin, can you put out your ciga...
oooh, tattoos...
And now for the bad:
Mesh! What? NO!!!!! Grandpa!? Beer! NO!!!! Oh god help me, nooooooooooooooNOOOOOOOO!!!Time for a palate-cleanser, QUICK! I don't wanna sign off on this blog like this!
...
.....
(Sigh...) Thank you, Raoul. Formally Signing off.
Speaking of which, what a good way to segue into Chapter Two of the Proper Male Dressing series. I think that Nikkia had some opinions about trousers?
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